By William F. Bultas
A well known saying fits each of the following strange situations. The saying could be
an adage, a famous line from a story or play, or something colloquial. The saying often
fits the situation only by using homonyms, homophones, synonyms, or by warping the
original meaning of the saying. If you give all of the problems a try before looking at the
answers, you can rank yourself with the scale below. The answers are linked at the end
of the adages. Have fun!
Number CorrectAdage Aptitude
6-8 Above Average
18-20 Adage Einstein
1. Jack liked to jog along a trail near a nuclear reactor. His wife, boss, doctor, & best
friend each warned him that this could be dangerous. He didn't listen, though, & now he
has an additional arm growing from each of his sides.
2. Mike cooks a meal that he calls Hope, which consists of bacon, eggs, pancakes, &
grits. He greatly enjoyed this meal one morning, but when he fixed it again the next
evening, it tasted terrible.
3. Julie's husband ran over their rake with a lawnmower. After bending the rake back
into shape, Julie secretly pretended to be married to the rake, which proved to be a
superior experience to her real marriage.
4. Alfonzo lived just outside of the town of Soared, until he passed away a couple of
5. Jake, Mark, Steady, Ron, & Slow ran in a race, & Steady & Slow tied for first
6. John & Joan were behind on paying their bills. Strangely enough, a man dressed as the
Grim Reaper showed up one Halloween with receipts proving that he had paid all of their
7. Tom Sullivan & his friend Meyer Weiner were at the Academy Awards. When a
beautiful actress who Tom was very fond of won an award & went on the stage to receive
her statuette, she kissed it. Tom then turned & said something to his friend.
8. The children at Sagacity Elementary School are very good about playing together
during recess. However, they never allow one boy, Well Enough, to participate, & they
never speak to him or have anything to do with him.
9. Little Sarah had been enjoying a couple of lollipops, but her mother told her to stop, or
it would ruin her dinner. Sarah became angry, & pressed the two lollipops together.
When they dried, they were connected to one another.
10. Al owed quite a bit of money to the mob. One day three gangsters pulled him into an
alley as he was walking by. Of the three mobsters, Stones was a six foot, 250 lb. ruffian,
Sticks was a former heavyweight boxer who stayed in shape, & Names was a four foot
tall, 98 pound criminal who was opposed to violence.
11. While Eric was baby-sitting his 4 younger brothers & sisters, he put in ear plugs, but
was careful to watch them very closely.
12. Sherri Fiddle went to the tennis court to meet her boyfriend, Bo, for a game. Bo
didn't show up, so Sherri didn't get to play tennis that day.
13. Lilly was a contestant on the Press Your Luck Game Show. She had to pick between
3 boxes, one of which contained several nice prizes. She would only receive the prizes if
she picked the box that contained them, so she picked the smallest box, & won.
14. During a minor earthquake, a crack developed all the way across the middle of Rick's home. The home immediately collapsed.
15. I was telling my dad about Lendon Best the other day, & he interjected that he had
met him before.
16. Todd has been losing his hair. He lost exactly one ounce of hair last month, & Josh
simultaneously grew an ounce of hair during the same time period.
17. Bob was riding through the woods on his way to town to purchase some supplies,
including a nail. During the ride, his shoe fell off. He dismounted to retrieve the shoe, &
his horse ran away. He ran after the horse, only to find that he had become lost in the
18. As Bob was trying to find his way out of the woods, he grabbed a twig & bent it out
of frustration. Suddenly, a tree next to him grew several inches.
19. Bob was so surprised at the fast growing tree that he began to rub his hand on a large
oak tree. The tree suddenly fell over, as did several oak trees near it.
20. Surviving several bizarre occurrences, Bob finally got his bearings, & determined that
if he took a nearby trail that was so narrow that it could only be traveled on foot, he
would cut a mile off of his walk into town, where he would
have to purchase his supplies, a new pair of shoes, & a horse. Before embarking on this
trail, a woman rode up, & asked him if he wanted to ride with her into town. "Are you
married?" Bob asked. "Why, no," answered the woman, as she blushed with a surprised